Great - I just spent the entire night being frustrated about how I had to stay up all night in order to get uninterrupted productivity time, and thus half the productivity time wasn't actually productive. I love my family, I do. It's just... I haven't found a way to resolve the compatibility issues between the world I was born into and the one I want to make. Every time I think I have, I haven't.

Sometimes it works and I can pull the two together, and this happens more and more, and that's real nice. And then sometimes I have to choose one to run towards and one to run away from, and... well, I've made the choice which one to go for when I have to choose. I can usually be a daughter and a Mel at the same time. And then sometimes I'm... a Mel.

Today: world-bridging FAIL.

Tomorrow: another chance to dance the balance right.

Right now I nap for an hour (yeah, it'll be enough sleep; I'll take another nap at lunch) and then I get into my car (yay car!) and do a first sprint from the hills. I wanted my piano tonight, but people were sleeping, and playing piano was what triggered the FAIL in the first place.

Frustration is okay. But sleep is good now. And I'll figure out a way to be both here and me at the same time when I wake up. We're just going to try again tomorrow.